Drive
by CrimsonSZ
Summary: What drives a person plays an important role in who they are. With the right drive, anyone can achieve something. Hikigaya Hachiman always had drive, but was it the right kind? This oneshot is inclined to disagree.


_"Hahaha, Hikifroggy-kun confessed to Orimoto-san? Who does he think he is?"_

_"I know right! She's way too good for him!"_

_"Ugh, I bet he dreams about going out with Kaori-chan all day! That explains why he always dozes off in __class!"_

_"Yeah! Creepygaya's eyes are so creepy because he thinks creepy things about Orimoto-chan! Kyaaa, I don't want him in our class!"_

_He had grown used to hearing words like these. Such words whispered in and outside of his presence were commonplace after he confessed to her, and though he felt the sting at first, he slowly grew accustomed to the venom._

_Now? They were mere nuisances, everyday noise that he tuned out as naturally as breathing._

_He heard their cries. They didn't want him here. Funnily enough, they didn't know he felt the same. So he worked, harder than he ever did before, to get himself out of this stagnant hell. After all, there was nothing left here for him. Orimoto's request was solved, and__ she had no use for him anymore._

_Good ridance. He got tired of her rather quick, anyway._

_His mother always told him not to trust overly nice people, that they always had an ulterior motive. Even if the motive is to maintain friendly relations with everyone and live peacefully, it's a motive nontheless._

_Humans are selfish by nature, and none are exempt from this rule. Therefore, the most one can do is use that selfishness to fuel themselves to be better. That's really all you can do; be better. Not nicer, not kinder, but better.__ Better at what? That's your choice._

_His father? Well, he thought similarly, though he believed it was his own right to find out how he wanted to do things. He believed he shouldn't let his parents influence him unless it helped him do what he wanted. In short, his father believed it was up to him to decide what was his __goal, and to use whatever was at his disposal to achieve it._

_Thus, Hikigaya__ Hachiman __had decided on a goal, and he would do everything he could to be better at achieving it._

* * *

~xXx~

Hayama told her there were rumours of a transfer student floating throughout the class. Apparently this student had gone from just another name in the rankings, to the undisputed top of the board, boasting a score that the second place was nowhere near achieving. Not to mention, an incredible amount of praise from all his teachers towards his sudden change in demeanour, from sleeping in class to staying back hours everyday.

In other words, another actor.

Interesting.

She was curious how the presence of this student would affect the class dynamic. After all, if mere rumours could already cause such a disturbance, then surely having him there would shake the entire foundation, right?

If that were truly the case, the peace that Hayato treasured so much, that he'd throw his and her relationship under the bus for, might be in trouble. In fact, she ventured to say the peace might just disappear. After all, someone who's insane enough to pull a 180 this drastic must have drive that's comparable to even herself, no?

Such a shame that she wouldn't be able to see this boy for herself. Here she was in Sobu after all, and he'd merely be starting his second year of middle school.

Well, she could just stay updated of his adventures through other methods. Poor Hayato might only suspect it, but she _knows_ just how much she has him wrapped around her fingers.

Bo-riiiing~

"Yukinoshita, penny for your thoughts?"

"Ah! Sorry Sensei, I'll start paying attention!"

* * *

~xXx~

Hikigaya-kun was, to put it simply, a strange one. The rumours made it sound like he was a closet genius, one who shied away from his true capabilities in order to keep himself in the same field as others. In other words, similar to Hayama-kun. However, what walked into class that day was anything but.

His appearance was dishevelled, unbelievably so. He had messy hair that was longer than allowed and his shirt was unironed and untucked. He was hunched over so much that he had to look up at Yamada-Sensei, who wasn't even that tall to begin with. However, most notable of all were his eyes.

They looked dead.

With all the good the rumours spoke of him, she expected someone with lively eyes, say for example, like her sister. Instead, he looked like someone who never had a friend in his life.

_Just like..._

No, she couldn't judge him like that.

Hikigaya-kun gave a curt introduction, one that was ripe with disdain, as if he found it unnecessary to introduce himself in the first place. He then made his way over to the corner seat by the door, immediately hiding himself behind the cover of an unrelated book. He didn't even take any time to observe the people in his class. He... had no intentions of knowing anybody.

What then were his reasons? Why had he hidden his potential in the past, only to reveal them later?

Why did he work so hard just to transfer schools, if not to find a place he could better fit?

Hikigaya Hachiman... why did he come here?

* * *

~xXx~

"I didn't!"

"C'mon Hina-chan, we all saw you do it. Stop lying already."

"I swear to you, I didn't! I would never!"

"Ebina, please. It'd be easier for you if you were honest."

Such a scene was just another of the ones she had seen plenty of times. A girl smarter, prettier, _more __liked_ than her peers, is ganged up on. The teacher believes the majority, and there is absolutely nothing the prey can do, no matter how true their words.

Nothing to be done, except for the prey to hopefully stand afterwards.

With a sigh, she began to make her way to the teacher's office, only to stop when she noticed something.

Someone approached.

A dishevelled looking boy, hunched over with his hands in his blazer pockets. His eyes were dead, like the fish in a market, yet in those eyes she saw a fire, one that promised to burn all who crossed it's path.

And it was directed at the predators.

_Straight out of a manga..._

The boy stopped a few meters away, those dead yet still burning eyes of his glaring daggers to those ganging up on the poor girl, particularly the teacher. With a dry chuckle, she plopped herself onto the wall behind them, folding her arms as she waited for the show to start.

"Eh, is something wrong, boy?"

"Yeah. You're in my way."

"Well, we're busy as you can see, so if you'd so kindly go around us-"

"-No."

"Beg your pardon?"

"You're not _literally_ in the way. You're just in. My. **Way**."

"Waaah!"

"Hey! What are you doing with Hina-chan!"

"Whatever it is, rest assured it is far more pleasant than what you're subjecting her to."

"Excuse me?!"

"No, you cannot be excused for this."

"Wait, you're Hikigaya, aren't you?"

"Hoh? So you do recognise me. Then you know what I'm capable of, huh?"

The silence that hung in the air invigorated her. Hikigaya, where had she heard that name? And what's he being so threatening for?

_"Shizuka-chan, you should've seen him!"_

Oh.

_Well._

"A-ah, well if you're taking Ebina's side... Then..."

"Then what, _sir?_"

The venom in his words, it should frighten her, yet it doesn't. After all, she knew his name.

"Well, I suppose Ebina was probably innocent after all."

"Haah?! Sensei, wha-"

"It's alright. I'll find the real culprit soon. Apologies Ebina, for doubting you. The rest of you should do so too."

"But Sensei-"

"-If Hikigaya trusts her, then we have made a mistake. Let's apologise and focus on finding who's actually guilty."

She didn't need to hear any more of it. The situation had been resolved. After all, who would ever want to get on the bad side of Hikigaya?

Who would want to be the enemy of someone who the principal respected?

She pulled the paper carton from her breast pocket, only to realise it was empty. She reached into her coat instead and pulled out a tin canister; a gift from her latest failure. Opening it, she noted the smell of the cigarettes inside. A change from the usual tobacco she was used to.

She lit one with a smile.

* * *

~xXx~

"What do you want, Yukinoshita?"

Boredom. He sounded bored, perhaps even tired by the idea of being here and speaking to her, but she knew better than to think that was the case. It had been 3 years after all, and she'd be no more than a fool if she didn't realise in that time that this was his default voice.

"A request, Hikigaya-kun. One I believe you can help me with."

"Oh? And what is it that even the great Ice Queen cannot do, yet the Loner King can?"

Hilarious as always, describing the two of them like that.

"She'd like to learn how to bake cookies."

"Eh? Isn't baking your thing?"

"While normally I'd be capable of fulfilling such a minute request, circumstances dictate that you would be better for the job."

"... What aren't you telling me?"

"You'll know once you see her."

"Do not play games with me, Yukinishita."

"Haven't we been playing one all this time?"

He did not quip back. Had she said something wrong? It was he who claimed relationships were a game of understanding, was it not?

"Hikigaya-kun?"

"N-no, you're right. I just thought of something is all."

"A penny for your thoughts?"

"It's nothing. Nothing worth your time."

"I believe that decision is mine to make, Hikigaya-kun."

_Tell me what bothers you._

He rubbed his nape with an awkward scowl, annoyed that she had cornered him like that. To be fair, she was merely obliging his wishes.

"Right... my bad. I just-someone else told me those exact words and, well. It's an unpleasant memory is all."

Oh.

"Apologies, I did not mean to open up old wounds."

"It's fine. So, about this request?"

"It's a delicate matter you see. She wishes to confess to someone," she paused, biting her bottom lip as she thought about what to say next, "and... thank him. For saving her dog from a l-limousine."

She watched as his eyes- surprisingly the most expressive part of him- widened in realisation.

"Is that why you couldn't tell me?"

"I. Yes, but, that's not what's important right now."

"Yeah, I believe it's my right to make that decision. Someone I care for still feels guilty for something she had no fault in, something that involves me getting hurt. That's definitely important in my eyes."

"Look, we can talk about this some other time. For now, will you help me or not?"

"... Fine. But I'm not doing it alone."

"I never said you would."

He chuckled. "Right. I'll do my part, and you do yours."

_We will talk about it._

"Of course, Hikigaya-kun."

* * *

~xXx~

She was shocked to see him walk through the door. When Yukinon said she'd bring someone over to help, he was the last person she expected to see. Even worse, his attention was directed at her, those eyes of his everyone feared looking her from top to bottom. If she didn't know any better, she would have called him out for being a pervert, but Hina had vouched for him before.

Plus, what he did for Sable...

"Seriously?"

The first word he said since entering the room.

"This is about your dog, isn't it?"

What?

"Listen, you don't need to do anything to 'repay' me. It was my choice to save the mutt, so as far as I'm concerned you owe me nothing. Also, any impression of me you might have from saving your dog is most definitely wrong, so throw away whatever you feel about me right this instant. Believe me, I'm much worse than anything you can conjure up."

Did he know?

Yukinon sighed as her fingertips met her forehead.

"Hikigaya-kun, what in the world are you doing?"

"Getting rid of any wrongful assumptions. Now, do you still want to bake cookies or not?"

... Ah. So that's how it is.

He really is...

"To be honest, I do want to learn how to bake. Mama told me I need to practice more, so I figured I could try a bit outside of the house. Cuz like, I always make a mess, and I feel bad when she insists on cleaning up for me. Eheheh."

Then for the first time since they met, she saw him smile. It was crooked, broken like he forgot how to in the first place. Nontheless, it was still a smile, one that was because of her.

She realised then, that it would be the only time he smiled because of her.

With the past forgotten, she set herself on a new path.

She wanted to know Hikigaya Hachiman.

* * *

~xXx~

Class loner.

Reputed jerk.

Insufferable asshole.

Smartass.

**Creep**.

So many words for just one guy, and they were never positive.

Even she knew that was too much bias to be true, yet apparently everyone else lacked the intelligence to realise that. Well, save for that one annoying clique with the blondies. One of em-scratch that, three of them now-knew, but never said anything in his defense.

Well, neither did she. Not out of spite or anything, no, rather an understanding that someone attracting _this_ much attention must be doing it on purpose. There was no need to defend him when he knew what he was doing.

That, or she's watched one too many of those Shounen animes with Taishi. He really needed to cut down on those.

Whatever the case, Hikigaya was someone she could say, at the very least, that she respected. That is why when she came to him today, she stood tall and met his eyes with a fierce fire of her own.

"Yo."

She cringed slightly at his greeting.

"I want your help."

"That much is obvious. What is it?"

"I want you to tutor me."

One eye squinted slightly as he quirked an eyebrow, waiting for her to explain.

"I need to make it into a University, but my education has been lacking recently when I began working part time."

"Oh? You've been going beyond the limit?"

"Tch, so what? I know ya ain't gonna tell no one."

"Well, I decline."

"Why?" she couldn't help but feel a tad bit miffed when the guy had the nerve to chuckle.

"You don't need tutoring; you've got the will to learn by yourself. You don't need a foundation; what you need is a new structure." he whipped out his phone and began typing something. "There's no point in working so hard to make cash when _scholarships_ exist."

He flipped the phone around for her to see, gesturing for her to take it. Hesitantly, she took it from his hand, now very much aware of what lied behind those grey orbs of his.

"With scholarships, you don't have to worry about the cost of pursuing further education. The government will cover it for you. All you have to do is register for it, and focus on your studies. You can of course continue working for some allowance, but not for more."

She handed the phone back to him, almost dropping it as she saw how his expression morphed. Gone was the deadpan she saw everyday in class, and replacing it was a disturbing grin.

"The hell do ya want?"

"Eh? Oh, no, nothing. I was just impressed by how much drive you have is all. You're really intent on getting a good education, huh?"

"Y-yeah. So what?"

"Was wondering why is all. No worries, I won't do anything. I'm far too lazy to go out of my way to satisfy curiosity." Hikigaya pocketed his phone before turning around to leave. "See you in class Kawasaki. Wouldn't want Sensei on your ass about truancy, would we?"

... So this is what Hikigaya Hachiman is like. Taishi was right, that sister of his was definitely holding back when she spoke of him. He was simultaneously worse and better than what she described.

She sighed as she adjusted her bag. Why did people in this school have to fluctuate in complexity? It was annoying figuring out who she was ahead of, and who she needed to keep up with.

* * *

~xXx~

She couldn't understand what all the fuss about him was for. Sure he's supposed to be smart, and Hina said he's actually a decent guy contrary to the rumours, but so what? Hayato was smart and nice too. She just couldn't understand why anyone would pay him any attention when it's obvious he doesn't want any.

Why couldn't everyone just leave the loner alone?

At this rate, she might just rope him into the clique like she did for Hina, if only so he would only have to bear the attention of them instead of, what, everyone else in class? Who knew how much more he got from outside of this room. Hina told her that this was what he wanted, but was that really the case? Why would someone who went out of their way to blend into the background want attention? It didn't make any sense.

He definitely wasn't _lonely_, considering Hina and Yui had decent relations with him, not to mention that infamous Ice Queen was known to speak with him occasionally. No surprises there; smart people tend to hang around each other since no one else could understand how they spoke. Oh yeah, and the other loner- Kawasaki was it?- wasn't disgusted by his mere presence, probably since she could somewhat relate.

"Oh, it's Hikigaya-kun."

She was snapped out of her thoughts by Hayato's voice. She followed his eyes to see that yes, Hikio was in fact on the tennis court. With Yukinoshita and Yui. And Sai-chan too?

"Ah, hopefully they don't mind letting us use the court."

Somehow, she doubted they would.

"Ah! Sai-chan!"

Oh dear. Looks like he overworked himself from the push-ups. Scraped his knee too. Didn't he know how weak he was? Why would he push himself so much?

Wait, Hikio?

"I told you to stop when you couldn't do anymore, didn't I?"

"But Hachiman," the silver-haired boy panted, "how can I improve if I don't push myself?"

"Idiot." Hikio poured water onto a hankerchief before using it to clean Sai-chan's wound, eliciting a wince from the other boy. "Pushing yourself is one thing, killing yourself is another. Muscles repair themselves when you damage them from exercising, growing stronger through the hardships you go through. However, if you irreversibly damage them, then all your work would be for nothing. Do you get what I'm saying?"

At this point, Yukinoshita had returned with a first-aid kit. Hikio retrieved a bandage from the box, sighing as he applied it on the boy's knee. "Your motivation is admirable, but this isn't an anime, and you aren't Saitama. The body has limits, and to not acknowledge them is reckless. Only when you recognise the limits can you work on increasing them. Now, get up, drink up, and rest."

Sai-chan stared at Hikio like he just heard the most inspiring words of his life.

"Oh! It's Yumiko and Hayato! Yahallo!"

"Hey Yui. You guys mind if we use the court?"

"Oh, no prob! Sai-chan needs to rest anyway, right Hikki?"

The boy grunted in response.

"Yes, it would seem as though Totsuka-san's request would have to be put on hold until he recovers.

Request?

"Say, would this have anything to do with the tennis club?"

"Huh? Miura-san?"

"I heard they were having some troubles. Something about not wanting to play anymore?"

"A-ah, yeah. The rest of the guys are-"

"Wimps, all of them."

There's Hikio with that infamous sharp tongue of his.

"Afraid of being disappointed again, afraid of failure. That's all they'll ever be if they don't try anymore. They'll be wimps. Failures, forevermore. That's why we'll continue helping you improve, because if they see how hard their captain is trying, then they'll follow suit. Humans are, by nature, monkey see monkey do."

"Mou, that's not a nice way to put it, but... thanks Hachiman, Yui, Yukinoshita-san."

_Hmm._

"Well then, can I help too?"

All four of them stared at her with varying levels of confusion and interest.

"Not to brag, but I'm pretty confident in my tennis skills, but I'm always lacking a partner to play with since Hayato's usually so busy. What do you say, quid pro quo?"

"Wow, you'd do that Yumiko-san? Thank you so much!"

No, she should be the one expressing her thanks. After all, it was his request that brought Hikio here today.

It was this request that let her see what Hikio wanted, even if it's just a peek.

Strangely, Hayato was rather silent throughout. Actually, this was the first time she ever saw him actually frown.

Are he and Hikio?...

* * *

~xXx~

"You're not nearly as much of a bimbo as you seem, are you Sagami?"

How dare he...

"After all, you know very well what you've done."

He has no right...

"You know how utterly **useless** you were."

He didn't know a thing...

"**You **caused her to overexert herself."

Hikigaya Hachiman...

**"You caused someone I cared for to fall sick."**

...

Had every right. And she knew better than to say otherwise to his face.

"Tell me then, you worthless excuse for a human being. What will you and your false sense of confidence do?"

Was he still going?

"Are you going to sit there and cry all day? Are you going to let the Culture Festival crash and burn?"

Why couldn't he just leave her alone?

"Or are you going to prove me wrong?"

Her eyes were in pain from how tightly shut they were.

"Tell me, Sagami. Tell me what you want to do now that your request cannot be fulfilled. Tell me what you plan to do, knowing that once all this fails, you won't get the attention you want."

And so, she opened them.

"I-"

"-Tell me with some real confidence for once, you deluded little-"

"I WILL PROVE YOU WRONG!"

Hikigaya Hachiman scowled.

"Will you now?"

"I swear I will do it! I know I can! I have people to help me! I will make it work!"

"As if. Everyone placed their confidence in Yukinoshita, everyone put their expectations on _her_. Not _you_. Once word gets out that she was doing all your work for you, that she fell ill as a result, no one would ever want to follow you. In fact, they'd be happy letting this whole event die just to spite you."

"No way! I'll win them back, I'll win them back and I'll prove you wrong!"

"And how do you plan on doing that?"

"I- I will..."

"Give up, Sagami. Stop trying to be someone you aren't."

She couldn't breathe.

"Stop trying to be a Yukinoshita. Stop trying to be a Hayama. Stop trying to be **me**. You can't. Accept your weakness, and work within your strengths. You know you're good with people, you know they'll suck up to you purely because you're acquainted with each other. You know they'll do what they can to block out all you've done wrong if you just came across as sincere.

You know they'll forgive you, don't you?

So why don't you stop trying to be the impossible, and try being Sagami Minami for once? Try accepting that you need to rely on others for once. Haven't you always?"

...

Hikigaya Hachiman...

How? Why?

"Who are you?"

"I should be the one asking that question, woman."

As she slowly picked herself up, she felt the tears come to a halt. Wiping away whatever remnants there were with her sleeve, she looked the loner in the eye, and found that the dull lifeless greys hid a fire, fierce and threatening. She couldn't be that. She always knew she couldn't. She just couldn't accept it. She couldn't accept being a failure.

But then... she could accept being Sagami Minami.

She could accept being someone who needed help to succeed, so long as she could succeed.

Couldn't she?

_Prove him wrong._

Yes. Yes, she could.

"I'll... apologise to Yukinoshita-san. A-and I'll hand over reigns to her. Everyone... will be counting on her. I will too. I will help her, so long as it helps me to succeed."

The boy she once thought of as nothing more than some smartass creep smiled triumphantly.

It was crooked, yes, but it was also every bit as triumphant.

* * *

~xXx~

"I see. So then, her request was fulfilled?"

"In a way." Hikigaya-kun raised the cup of tea to his lips. Then he put it back down with a hiss, having yet again burnt his tongue. "Tch. Well, the request wasn't fulfilled as much as it was replaced. In other words, she found something else to chase after."

"She found who she wanted to be?"

"I guess."

"I see. That's acceptable. It appears you have my thanks yet again, Hikigaya-kun."

"Don't mention it."

Was that a touch of happiness she heard slip through?

"You have gotten softer, haven't you?"

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, you look more... how do I put it?"

"Want me to start listing cliche descriptions of calmness?"

"No. I suppose there is no real way to explain you, is there? Though I suppose the same can be said about everyone. Still, the air around you has changed somewhat."

"Heh. Is that so?"

"Yes."

She watched as he slowly sipped from his cup, releasing a content sigh afterwards. She noted how his eyes, while still decisively dead, appeared to have widened somewhat. They were no longer the troubled slits she remembered from middle school. Did that mean that Hikigaya-kun had moved on? Had he too, found something else to chase after?

"Oi, what's bothering you?"

She was surprised by the fact she couldn't formulate an answer.

"Yukinoshita? What did I do?"

Everything.

She very much wanted to say so, but she knew that it wouldn't be good enough. No, 'Everything' was far too generic to do Hikigaya-kun justice.

Then, what would?

"Hikigaya-kun... while I don't have the exact words to express how I feel, I know that what I feel is genuine. That is why I ask you not to question my feelings for what I'm about to do next."

"What are you-"

The tea was sweet, yet it had an obvious bitter aftertaste.

She liked it.

"Yukinoshita..."

"Yes, Hikigaya-kun?"

"You're sure this is what you want?"

"Yes, I am sure."

"Then..."

"Is this what _you_ want, Hikigaya-kun?"

The answer was obvious.

* * *

**A/N:** Truth be told, I don't why I wrote this. I don't know what I was trying to do with Hikigaya in this story. All I know is this; I do believe that this is in character. Circumstances make this Hikigaya Hachiman different from canon, but only just. The core of it all, what drives him, should be the only difference. Otherwise, I failed in getting my point across.

You can probably tell, but I ended it off where season one of the anime left us, at least, chronologically. I was thinking of writing for season two's events, but I felt happy with how it ends, so I left it there. If the demand is great, and if I do feel the motivation again, I suppose I'll chalk up a season two. Until then, I'll keep working on my Haunted series.

Oh, and just in case someone asks, this is separate from my series of oneshots because I actually feel. Well, not proud per se, but satisfied with this one. It's not just another random oneshot to stuff in there and forever forget.

Well, until next time then.


End file.
